Blue Eyes 2

[Mohd. Arshad]

There is the ocean
So blue so deep so wild
I have drowned
She has the blue eyes

[Reilley]

A well-made analogy. My only nit is a lack of punctuation.  Keep writing.

[Fire Monkey]

Yes, I too like this but, while I often do not use punctuation in poems, I have to agree with Reilley on this one, it would make the poem clearer. It's always a good idea to read your poems out loud and see if they flow clearly when spoken as written because while you know how it is supposed to be read, someone else will not have that insight and must work it out only from what is on the page. Still, I do like this.

[saore]

There is an ocean

So blue so deep so wild

I have drowned...
Her eyes


I wonder if you need to tighten this one a little.  I like its simplicity.

Sergio