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Post by Lisa Arnold on Mar 30, 2014 0:26:28 GMT -6
Redemption's Rescue
coffee-stained
James Dean
T-shirt
blue jeans torn
at both knees
tenth cigarette
burning
in ashtray
frozen dinner
cooking in oven
empty Jack
Daniels
bottle turned
on its side
twenty-five dollars
in pocket
eviction notice
crumpled on floor
empty thoughts
ramble
inside his
weary mind
vacant eyes
glare through
veiled mirror
reflection
contemplation
of a reckless fate,
while a prayer
is whispered for
redemption's
rescue
©2012 Lisa Arnold ***this poem was first published in a slightly different form in All Things Girl and it is also published in my poetry book Echoes of My Soul |
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pegesus
Junior Member
To learn from Life is to live Life
Posts: 54
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Post by pegesus on Mar 30, 2014 13:05:36 GMT -6
Lisa, this is great, I felt myself within his mind, within his space, sharing his feelings. Your words gave me the picture to follow and feel. Hmmmm,, in your book? maybe thats telling me i'll find more of your great words
love and hugs
mary etta
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Post by Daniel Mark Extrom on Mar 30, 2014 13:40:19 GMT -6
Hi Lisa! Nice to meet you!
You know how to paint a picture. And a sad one at that.
Well done.
Dan
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Post by Lisa Arnold on Mar 30, 2014 16:27:20 GMT -6
Lisa, this is great, I felt myself within his mind, within his space, sharing his feelings. Your words gave me the picture to follow and feel. Hmmmm,, in your book? maybe thats telling me i'll find more of your great words love and hugs mary etta Hello Mary, thanks so much! Your kind words made my day  It would be a true honor if you read my book it take care, Lisa |
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Post by Lisa Arnold on Mar 30, 2014 16:28:36 GMT -6
Hi Lisa! Nice to meet you! You know how to paint a picture. And a sad one at that. Well done. Dan Hello Dan, thank you so much, I really appreciate your kind comments about my poem. it was nice to meet you as well |
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Post by Reilley on Apr 1, 2014 12:46:45 GMT -6
I have been in this exact circumstance and lived to tell the tale. Your words brought it back to me in a rush, which is one of the most powerful things poetry can accomplish. Great job, I enjoyed it.
Keep writing!
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Post by Lisa Arnold on Apr 4, 2014 1:53:19 GMT -6
Hello Reilley, thanks so much for your kind words. I am so glad that you lived to tell the tale |
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Post by eiken on Apr 4, 2014 12:50:03 GMT -6
Lisa,
I really liked this write, bleak world, sad, deep, powerful and you took me with you and your imagery and use of the senses is great, the smells and tastes of the ashtray, empty Jack Daniels, frozen dinner, the weariness of this person's life is palpable!! Great work.
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Post by Lisa Arnold on Apr 5, 2014 2:08:50 GMT -6
Hello Eiken, Many thanks for commenting on my poem, I really appreciate the kind remarks! Lisa |
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saore
Junior Member
Posts: 91 
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Post by saore on Apr 7, 2014 14:53:51 GMT -6
wonderful poem I can relate to this one.
Sergio
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Post by Lisa Arnold on Apr 10, 2014 2:33:52 GMT -6
thanks for the kind comment Sergio |
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Post by Lisa Arnold on Jan 9, 2015 8:54:38 GMT -6
Hello all,
I just wanted to thank everyone for commenting again and to say HAPPY NEW YEAR to you all
I hope many of you will come back, I love this site and miss your writing
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