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Post by JanetGunn on Mar 7, 2011 16:18:33 GMT -6
Poetic Soul so beautiful and free Inspiration within Divinity expressing so perfectly Speak to me Whispering softly The desire for eternity Heart so pure Love so true Ancient one from long ago That walks the earth once more Breaking through the darkness That dwells so deeply here Courage is needed to find the light And walk with truth Gifts are given and received Always with a blessing True self awakens Divinity resides within Connecting our hearts and souls To all that is Fear is abandoned only when True love is conceived For that is divine The true gift To be given and received Attachments:
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Post by Fire Monkey on Mar 7, 2011 16:58:09 GMT -6
I notice that there are a couple rhymes within this work - are those intended or just happenstance? If intended, was the idea then to start with a rhyme and end with a rhyme [which seems the case] and then to be unrhymed between and [one last question] what was the intent of the rhymes. Obviously if the rhymes were by chance rather than plan then those questions are unimportant. To me, it works either way, though if the rhymes were intended I might suggest trying for slightly stronger rhymes [the fact that they were not strong rhymes is why I suspected they might have been just chance]
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Post by SweetSilverBird on Mar 8, 2011 4:15:34 GMT -6
I loved this poem alot. I only noticed one mistake, and that was in the spelling of hearts in the line: "Connecting our hearts and souls' only you have it as 'heats'. I hope I am not presuming incorrectly.
Very beautiful feelings.
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