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Post by Brigid Briton on Aug 8, 2011 20:32:23 GMT -6
Hi everybody! It's been a while since we've had a challenge so try this one on for size. Write a poem using all of the ten words below: azure lost tender spoken day revealed happened over touch well-worn If you're not feeling that ambitious, I'd settle for a poem that uses only five! Anybody want to play?  Brigid |
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Post by Brigid Briton on Aug 8, 2011 21:08:21 GMT -6
OK,
I put something together containing all ten words. It wasn't too hard, so some of you clever people should be able to come up with something, too, without too much trouble.
Here goes:
She returns over and over
to that well-worn memory
of the day it happened,
when she saw herself
revealed for the first time
in his tender eyes,
then got lost in those azure mirrors,
as his touch bound her heart
forever
without a word
being spoken.
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Post by diannet on Aug 8, 2011 21:33:33 GMT -6
Okay Brigid here's my ten
Under The Azure Bay
She was lost
the last tender touch of spring
left with it a well-worn memory
of the day it happened
where you had skimmed the stones
over the water
smiling with what I now know was menace
you let her sink
deep in the bay
under sparkling azure
where she now lurked
waiting to be revealed
and the truth spoken
but you hadn’t finished
not yet...
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Post by diannet on Aug 8, 2011 21:35:31 GMT -6
Oh I just realised how I used the same phrases....oops I might just rewrite that...isn't funny how the mind works  |
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Post by Brigid Briton on Aug 8, 2011 21:41:44 GMT -6
Hi Dianne, I took the liberty of italicizing the challenge words in your poem. I was counting "well-worn" as one word so you actually only have nine out of the ten, "spoken" being missing. I really like your poem, though, it's got mystery and creepiness and you reeled it off quite fast---very well done! |
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Post by diannet on Aug 8, 2011 22:15:17 GMT -6
I just added spoken...  |
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Post by thisismyengland on Aug 9, 2011 13:53:09 GMT -6
Yep, yep, I will play. I don't seem to be writing poesy at the moment. The damned keyboard is tapping out other forms. The last one I liked at all was the one I wrote in response to the 'finicky' challenge so perhaps I need these rules and limits to get me going. The brain is turning these words over. Let's see what rumbles out of the tumble dryer. Stay tuned. There's never a deadline to these things, is there? Deadlines are for the working world, right?
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Post by daphnepurpus on Aug 9, 2011 14:13:42 GMT -6
azure skies touch
tender well-worn memories
spoken over a day
when much happened
the lost revealed
(Italics added by Brigid)
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Post by Brigid Briton on Aug 9, 2011 14:24:39 GMT -6
Hi "t.i.m.e." Nope, no time limit, although I might point out that Daphne just checked in and within minutes produced a very short piece that contained all ten words. Daphne, amazing way to rise to the challenge! |
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Post by daphnepurpus on Aug 9, 2011 14:30:33 GMT -6
Thanks, Brigid. Didn't think I could do it in a haiku, but tanka works! And your e-mail should be a reminder to me to check the challenge section more frequently as I do love that sort of thing!
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Post by thisismyengland on Aug 9, 2011 23:44:14 GMT -6
with mushy peas
-------------------------------------
get lost in twisty lanes,
play eighteen holes of crazy golf,
stumble to the chunky pub
and inhale
the chunky chips,
the ozone,
the rock;
tip the pretty waitress, snap
the lean limbs, the
snarly glance, the
daubed walls, the
wheeling gulls;
dodge
their terrible excrement, step
over the comatose,
the well-worn baldies, and the
tender flesh in lo-rise board shorts,
wasted alike on unalike poisons,
getting twisted
at the groynes;
lost minds touch
azure sky:
every day the same
since that fire thing
happened.
(italics added by Brigid)
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Post by diannet on Aug 10, 2011 17:22:00 GMT -6
So many different styles of poetry...that's what makes this forum great and it really stands out when everyone takes part in these fun challenges. I REALLY liked this one Brigid... |
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Post by Brigid Briton on Aug 10, 2011 18:48:33 GMT -6
Hi "time", Well, you got eight out of the ten. (You left out "revealed" and "spoken"). Since I was willing to settle for five of the ten, you exceeded that expectation by three! |
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Post by thisismyengland on Aug 11, 2011 1:23:18 GMT -6
Hi "time", Well, you got eight out of the ten. (You left out "revealed" and "spoken"). Since I was willing to settle for five of the ten, you exceeded that expectation by three! Oops. That was an oversight. I'm not unhappy with the end result though. |
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Post by Deleted on Aug 11, 2011 7:05:14 GMT -6
I was lost from the moment
Those two words were spoken
“They’re coming,” You said
And the sunrise was broken
Split down the middle
It revealed what happened
When dark fae took over
And day became night
They flew down to gather
And stare at us coldly
Their azure eyes assuring
That to touch was to die
They looked sweet and tender
Really, they were deadly
Not of your well-worn tales
These creatures of the night
(Italics added by Brigid)
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Post by Brigid Briton on Aug 11, 2011 7:30:08 GMT -6
Wow! Tashie, I'd say your muse has just come back! It's amazing that in the few minutes between my inviting you here via Twitter, you not only signed up but whipped out a poem using all ten of the challenge words. Not just any poem, but one full of intrigue and somewhat scary images. Great job! I hope you'll look around a bit, and, if you like what you see, that you'll stick around and share some more of your work with us. We are a workshop type forum, where members offer critique and suggestion to each other in the interest of helping us all grow as poets and I hope this fits your expectations. I've sent you a PM officially welcoming you too. Let me know if you have any questions. Brigid |
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Post by eiken on Aug 11, 2011 8:45:10 GMT -6
Surging surf.
Lost under an azure sky
the hard sand crunches
under my feet as I walk
the length of the tide-line.
Alone with my thoughts,
his last tender words spoken
play in the reels of my mind.
I recall the sun in his eyes,
his lips quivering
the day he revealed
what had happened to him.
We were both so young,
I could not understand
his final wish to be alone.
Our love was over,
I cried endless tears
How could I love again?
And as I scan the sky,
I hear the gulls calling me.
The breeze is stronger now.
I wrap his well-worn jacket
tightly around me.
Always safe in his arms,
his scent envelops me.
His smooth embrace
gently touches my face,
I breathe in his memory
and I smile knowing
that our love is held forever
in the surge of the sea.
(Italics added by Brigid)
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Post by eiken on Aug 11, 2011 8:49:16 GMT -6
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Post by dustandwater on Aug 11, 2011 11:59:13 GMT -6
Azure, azure, a starting point,
as I try to remember what happened.
a cure, a cure, a lingered gaze into your eyes,
azure.
A gentle touch from fingertips on well-worn skin,
a warmth that radiates until I'm lost.
A tender smile upon your lips and in your eyes,
azure,
a love revealed within, a love so pure.
And straight away I know it's over,
before my words are even spoken,
before my tears are even spent,
I know it's over,
know I'm safe,
know I'm right where I belong,
azure.
(italics added by Brigid)
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Post by dustandwater on Aug 11, 2011 12:23:00 GMT -6
Wow, Brigid; This is one of the most successful challenges yet, I believe.
Perhaps the Ten Word Challenge should become a regular feature?
Some fantastic responses and so varied. I'm really impressed with everyone here. Well done to all those of you who came out to play.
Brigid, a great first entry to set the bar. I love the finding and losing of oneself posed so closely.
Diannet, a poem so full of intrigue. What intrigues me the most is the perspective of the poem. Who is it that knows? and is it he/she who might become the next target? Very suspenseful.
Daphne, a brilliant Tanka. I set out to make mine short and as a result ended up with something wuite abstract, I think. I'm in awe at how lucid yours remains in its brevity. Superb response.
t.i.m.e, your right to be pleased with the result of this response. It might in fact be one of my favorites from you, as it happens. I particularly like how the "lost minds touch azure sky", very clever.
tashie, I haven't read you yet, so "welcome to the forum" and "nice to 'meet' you". A great response; very spooky. I had to google 'far' and now that I have I see that your description is very apt.; I'll definitely be looking out for more from you.
eiken, a very emotive piece. I very much like your description of the jacket and the sensory memories it provokes. I count 9… I think you could maybe fit 'spoken' into the first stanza when you talk about words; what do you think?
Once more, well done Brigid for corralling the group so effectively.
-D&W
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