Why Dogs Sniff Butts

[Reilley]

The canines once had a doggy party.
They all traveled from near and far,
While some dogs flew in by airplane
Some went by bus, train or car.


They all went into the hotel’s lobby
And they signed the visitors´ book,
Then each one hung his bum and his tail
Upon a separate bum-tail hook

Now there was one dog who wasn’t invited,
And this really aroused his ire,
So he rushed into the banquet hall,
And loudly barked out, ´Fire!´

This got the dogs so frightened,
They had no time to look,
And each one just grabbed a bum and tail,
From off the closest hook.

It is truly a sad sorry story,
For it is a very difficult chore,
To wear another dog’s bum and tail,
That you have never worn before.

That is why when dogs now meet
In the park or over a bone
Each sniffs the other dog’s bum and tail
In hopes they might have found their own.

[Fire Monkey]

Ok, that is definitely different I was unsure when I looked at the title but forged ahead and I now think it is a cute poem. ;D

[Brigid Briton]

Hi Reilley,

This reminds me that my brother-in-law's dog is named Reilley. Could that be the reason you have so much "insider information" on this topic?

I enjoyed this---it's very imaginative, even if not very appetizing!



Brigid

[Reilley]

Thanks - this was written in response to my then seven year old daughter asking me at the dinner table why dogs did that. It was a story my grandfather told me.

[Fire Monkey]

Ah yes, children do ask just the most darling questions at just the most breathtakingly -ah- interesting times ;D

An excellent answer I'd say.

[jponceby]

I enjoyed this very much. What fun. And finally an explanation!! LOL The only critique I would have is the next to last stanza didn't flow as well as all the others for me. But other than that it is marvelous. I wish they had a favorite list we could keep on here This would be in it. Thank you for sharing.

[Amanda Moore]

This is hilarious it almost reminds me of Dr Seuss nice and light hearted! ;D

[elizajgomez]

Hilarious and so clever--I needed a laugh right now, thanks! Well done

[dustandwater]

Excellent. This is one of the funniest poems I have read in a long time.

I generally struggle to create humour in my poems and here you have done it so effectively.

I'm intrigued; did you come up with the concept just for the poem or is it a story you grew up with? It feels very much like something grandparents might tell a small child.

I have given it a mention on twitter.

-D&W

Mod: Just read a reply above that I had missed. I now see where it came from. The poem makes for a truly wonderful adaptation. Well done!

[Roy]

One of my friends in the army in Hong Kong in the '60s used to recite this whenever he got pissed. Of course it was a much cruder version. I've been looking for the words for years. Thanks for posting.

[Janette Dyer]

My doggies story told by my dad  .He was born in 1909.    Told me he heard a Doggy Story recited while a young lad & thought it a bit rude so being a poet he made up his own version.

I'll tell you an old old story, it's one my great grandfather used to relate.
It's naught to do with Sam's Birdeye Maple or Noah & his arc and it's fate.
Or with Albert and his Horses-Head Handle that he pocked in lion's ear at the zoo.
I know you want believe me but it's true.  It's about a Doggies Meeting.
There were dogs of all dimensions gathered round from far and near,
To fix up Laws & Pensions.   Now Parson Brown his dog was there ,
He was very small, he cockied up his little leg up against the wall,
And when the steam began to rise he thought he was on fire,
So he cockied up his little leg and peed a little higher.
Another  little doggie feeling hail and hardy came trotting through the woods,
Where trees were holding a party.    Have one on me a big tree said "I'd love to be your host,
" No can do " the doggie said " I've just had couple back on post ".

To Get back to the meeting that was held in  a great big hall,
The doggies had taken off their tails and hung them around the wall.
They had just elected their chairman a great big dog called "Manire" 
And things were going smoothly, When one dam fool dog  yelled out "Fire"
The doggies all rushed out the hall, they grabbed a tail off the wall,
They got their tails all mixed up,and it was very very sore
To have to ware a tail you hadn't warn before.
So now if you see a doggie on the street or even home ,inspect another doggie tail
He's still looking for his own.

[Peter]

Mar 7, 2011 11:04:32 GMT -6 Reilley said:

The canines once had a doggy party.
They all traveled from near and far,
While some dogs flew in by airplane
Some went by bus, train or car.


They all went into the hotel’s lobby
And they signed the visitors´ book,
Then each one hung his bum and his tail
Upon a separate bum-tail hook

Now there was one dog who wasn’t invited,
And this really aroused his ire,
So he rushed into the banquet hall,
And loudly barked out, ´Fire!´

This got the dogs so frightened,
They had no time to look,
And each one just grabbed a bum and tail,
From off the closest hook.

It is truly a sad sorry story,
For it is a very difficult chore,
To wear another dog’s bum and tail,
That you have never worn before.

That is why when dogs now meet
In the park or over a bone
Each sniffs the other dog’s bum and tail
In hopes they might have found their own.

[Peter]

My grandfather first told me the poem about the firemans ball and he has been dead 40 years. Also for those how are old enough to remember a series of movies called Smile with Chips Rafferty in it Smile quoted this poem at school one time

[Blah blah]

DOOGGGGGYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

[Spud]

It is a good poem.  However, the "original" was a little different.  I was handed the original poem in 1999 when the the friend of the "original" poet typed it out for me and let me have it.  I may still have it somewhere in the attic.  The basic theme is still the same though so not a problem.  Should maybe have had a note on saying that its a rewrite from the 90's

[Spud]

Found it!  The argument between the two was that my friend included it in a book but didn't reference it as the "original" poets name hence there was a bit of an argument.  The original poem fromthe 1990's went like this.........

THE DOG'S TEA PARTY

The doggies had a party

They came from near and far

The poor ones came by bicycle

The rich ones came by car

And as each doggy entered

The large ones and the small

They all took off their arseholes

And hung them on the wall

The Mayor spoke from the platform

He was a bloody liar

When one big breasted bulldog

Jumped up and shouted "FIRE!"

There was a mighty panic

And without a second look

The dogs snatched off their arseholes

From any bloody hook

The moral of the story is

Where-ever they may roam

Dog's smell each other's arses

To try to find their own

So, now you know the original

[Linda Mcintosh]

Sorry to upset all who claim theirs to be the original. I think the original has been changed many times. I am 67 yrs old and first heard this “story” Xmas Eve 1963!
Told by a old lady, aCockney (Londoner) Cissie Lovejoy to all gathered in our Clovelly, Sydney (Australia) home. The basis of the story is correct and knowing the English humour and specially the London Cockneys I would say it originated there. So glad it is still revived as it is a fond memory from my childhood.

[Daveee]

Correct   I heard it back in the late 60s